Memorial Day Weekend

Before our surprise appearance of baby Jack, we had purchased tickets for Thomas the Train Day at the Heber Valley Railroad. My mom, with her super awesome connections, had obtained a two-room suite at Stein Erikson, and we had decided to stay the night before the train ride. With the doctor's go ahead, we decided to go through with our plans.

I envisioned swimming by the pool, walks through the mountains, and all around sunshine, but instead, we got this:So we relaxed and carried on as usual with a little of this:And that:We threw in jumping on the bed,And pillow fights.The next morning, Pa, Cole, Bryce, and I set out for the railroad. (Thanks go out to Nana, who obliging tended Jack!) And thanks to Bryce's trust in Google maps, we soon got lost. Our ride time was at 10:30. 10:29 saw me running, with stroller slung across my back, to get on the train. And yes, I had to run past the entire trainload of passengers staring at me out the windows. I was not pleased.It was cold. The train ride was short and never went over about 2 miles an hour. The tickets were ridiculously expensive. But somehow, this face made it worth it.We met up with Bill, Carrie, and Isak, who were so sweet about us being an hour late to the station. We played trains:Golfed:
And attempted to get the boys to take "just one!' picture together. We did not succeed.
We ended the day with a trip to McDonalds and lots of laughter.Not too shabby, let's just hope that warmer weather is on the way!

At Home

We couldn't believe that Jack was coming home, and were so excited. Wednesday, we headed to the NICU for (knock on wood) the last time. We got our marching orders, said farewell to the nurses, and loaded Jack into the car seat. (At which point, I thought, "I cannot believe they are letting me take home this tiny baby!")I drove Jack home while Bryce picked up Cole. When he got home and saw his little brother, he got a huge smile on his face and kept laughing. The boys gave each other Build-a-Bears - it's amazing how presents can start things off on the right foot.
Jack is doing fantastically, and is adjusting to life at home pretty well. He is now up to 4 pounds 11 ounces, and I'm excited for him to break that 5 pound mark. Cole is a very concerned older brother, and is constantly peaking in Jack's crib and asking, "Is he doing okay?"

We absolutely love having him home, and life feels a bit more "normal" now. I am so glad that we are on the other side, and looking back, I realize how truly blessed we are. So many things could have happened that didn't. I am truly grateful for all of the love and support we received, and for those fantastic nurses at the NICU for loving and caring for Jack like he was their own.

Now, it's time to move on. I will take the advice of the wise Mumford and Sons:

"Get over your hill and see what you find there, with grace in your heart and flowers in your hair."

Perspective

I was folding laundry when I noticed...

Preemie/Newborn/3T

Is it possible to be blown away by how tiny one little boy is and how big the other is, all at the same time?

Coming Home!

We were shocked when we arrived to the NICU on Friday to this...
No feeding tube!

Jack had hit 4 pounds and was making all the right steps. We were told that once he had been eating all his meals from a bottle for 48 hours without any "episodes" that it would be time for him to come home. We kept our expectations low and thought we might have another week or so.

Not so.

We were told today that Jack will be coming home on Tuesday! This weekend has been spent frantically trying to get ready everything we had been thinking we had time to do - buying diapers, washing sheets and blankets, and cleaning the house.

I'm not sure why I'm surprised with how things are going, this little guy has been on his own schedule for some time. We were told to expect him to come home around his due date - June 23rd, and instead it will be May 24th. The nurses are all very impressed and call him their "over achiever."

Nonetheless, we are all very excited, and Cole can't wait to hold his little brother. We welcome visitors, but please remember that Jack will continue his same schedule that he was on in the NICU and can only be held for short periods of time, so please call before you come. Also, no kids for the next few weeks.

Doughnut

This is pretty much how I feel inside every time I eat a doughnut...

DELICIOUS!!!

Our Little Man

My sweet and fabulous cousin Jenn took these amazing pics of our little Jack last weekend. I think they speak for themselves.
As an update, last Sunday, they took Jack out of the isolette, and now he is just in a regular crib. He was just too hot in the isolette. He is able to eat as many of his meals as he will take from a bottle, and we've had fun learning to feed him. His progress is amazing, and the nurses just love him. Last night, his case manager told me, "He doesn't know how little he is - he thinks he's a big boy!"

*If you like the pics above, I recommend you head on over to http://jennculley.blogspot.com/ to see even more.*

Bittersweet

**Caution - blatant self-pity ahead.**

This morning, as I struggled to find some piece of clothing that might actually fit, I pulled all of my maternity clothes out into a pile. As I stared at the gathered shirts and paneled pants, a huge wave of sadness hit me as I confronted the reality that I would never be pregnant again. Bryce and I have always just wanted two kids, so I knew this would be my last, I just didn't know it would be cut short. I think one of the hardest moments of this experience was when the doctor walked into my room and said I would not be dealing with bed rest, but would be having a c-section, and having it now. In that moment, I realized I would not have this baby with me any more - not feel him kick and poke me, or get hiccups in the middle of the night. After the surgery, it was almost like having phantom limb pain - every tummy bubble or gurgle made me automatically smile until I remembered.

What they never tell you about experiences like this is how hard the little things are. There was no small crib in the hospital room that visitors could peer into and proclaim how adorable that baby was. Nobody tells you how you alternately love the NICU nurses for how kind they are, but secretly kind of hate them when they come to tell you your half hour is up. They don't tell you how hard it is to walk past the new parents loading their babies in their cars on your way out. There's no book which explains how to tell your 2 year old son that he can't hold his new brother.

I don't want anyone to think that I'm whining - I realize how incredibly blessed we are and how things could be very, very bad. Jack is doing so well, and has not once given us cause for alarm. I've been lucky enough to have two (mostly) healthy pregnancies. For all this, I am truly grateful. I just think putting some of this down into writing might help me let go.

In that spirit, I conclude with my one and only pregnancy pic - taken two days before Jack was born, and a promise to focus on the positive from this point on.

Rewind to Easter

This was a great Easter - lots of time spent with family, good food, and plentiful Easter eggs!

Saturday was the big hunt at the Thomsen's. Cole had a great time with "The Cousins," and loved finding eggs.Sunday found us with Pa and Nana and another fabulous hunt. Somehow, the Easter bunny knew Cole would like Thomas the Train sets...

One Week Old

It's hard to believe that Jack was born one week ago - what a crazy week it's been! He's doing very well, and keeps surprising us with how fast he's progressing. He is completely off of oxygen and is breathing room air on his own. His feedings are slowly being increased, and he's keeping everything down. We're so happy that he is doing well and look forward to seeing him get a little bigger.

Cole is excited to be a big brother and keeps asking when it will be his turn to hold the baby. He seems so big to me now, and is becoming quite the chatterbox. He's doing pretty well through all these crazy changes, but if anyone has any tips about how to welcome a new baby in the house with a toddler, please let me know!